Lez Keep It Real

This week’s Come Out Play post spotlights coming out on the job.

I work a nine-to-five job at pretty large corporation downtown in which most of my day is spent writing in some shape or form, coming up with catchy taglines and trading witty comments with my co-workers. At work, it’s no secret that I am a lesbian. In fact, I’ve never been one to hide or avoid it.

Now don’t get the wrong idea. I don’t wear rainbow colored socks to work every day, nor do I have a huge rainbow flag waving over my cubicle, flapping in the wind of the air conditioner. What tipped my coworkers off? I don’t know exactly. It might have been that little ditty I wrote for a My View Column in The Buffalo News in November off 2005 about gay marriage where I basically announced to the entire city that I was, in fact, a lesbian and that I also wanted to get married someday. Shrug. OR it could simply be the fact that I talk openly about who I am and trust that I work with a good group of solid individuals who are all open minded and accepting. I know that I am lucky because I can’t imagine what my work days would be like if I had to hide my sexuality. But for others, it might be more difficult depending on the situation. Coming out at work involves a wealth of factors from how close you are to your co-workers to what the non-discrimination policy is to what type of atmosphere you work in.

For those of you who haven’t come out yet, or are thinking about coming out at work, Human Rights Campaign offers some sound tips as well as some important questions to consider:

• Does your employer have a written non-discrimination policy? Does it specifically cover sexual orientation and/or gender identity/expression?

• Does insurance cover domestic partner benefits? Does health coverage cover transitioning costs?

• Is there a gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender employee resource group at your workplace?

• What’s the overall climate in your workplace? Do people tend to make derogatory comments or jokes? Are any of your co-workers openly GLBT?

• What are your work relationships like? Do people discuss their personal lives? Are they asking questions about yours? Is the atmosphere friendly or guarded?

• Does your state or locality have a non-discrimination law including sexual orientation and gender identity/expression?

• Is your company ranked on the Human Rights Campaign Corporate Equality Index? If so, what rating has it earned?

Once you’ve assessed your workplace atmosphere, here are some practical steps to take:

• Identify someone who is GLBT or GLBT-supportive, and talk to them first.

• Take a breath. People will often take their cues from you on how to talk and feel about GLBT issues. The more casual you are, the more likely they are to follow your lead.

• Make a plan. HRC has tools for coming out and transitioning at work.

• Talk about GLBT-related news stories, movies, TV shows or other topics as a way to signal your views or start the conversation.

• Bring a partner or date to company functions, or have them meet you at work one day.

• Put an HRC sticker and/or a picture of your partner on your desk. You can even put an HRC Coming Out Project screen saver on your computer.

The benefits of being open at work are plentiful because it eliminates the need to hide or mislead, makes deeper friendships possible, breaks down barriers to understanding, builds trusting working relationships, and lets us bring our “whole selves” to work. Being open can even make you more productive, and can even benefit your career because your peers will see you in a new, perhaps even courageous, light.

Also, when you are open and honest at work, it can help educate your heterosexual coworkers on the importance of equal rights and benefits. Your coworkers will no longer see homosexuality as being something foreign or unknown. They can put a face to it and that makes it familiar. It makes it human. And as human beings, we all deserve equal right regardless of our sexuality.

As for me, I’m not one to want to climb the corporate ladder. (I’m afraid of heights!) And someday I plan on working full time from home. But for now, I can enjoy the atmosphere at my current place of employment without any fear of discrimination. Just the other day, a coworker of mine wore a shirt that just happened to be colored in a rainbow pattern. She proudly strutted over to my desk and asked me if she could be gay for the day. She wanted to be part of the club. I smiled and said, “Sure!”

After all, who am I to discriminate?

Got an interesting coming out story to tell? Contact me and I will feature it in an upcoming post of Come Out & Play.

come out & play, coming out on the job, human rights campaign, discriminate, glbt support, non-discrimination policy, out at work