Lez Keep It Real

This week’s Come Out & Play post spotlights Takeshii, a 22-year-old Japanese-American engineering student:

My story isn’t that loud or spectacular, but.. I think it’s the way it happens for a lot of people. I didn’t really come out, people just.. eventually guessed and prodded until I admitted it.

It became apparent to everyone by my junior year of high school. My sisters both suspected because I never dated, but my friends were surprised because I don’t have the stereotypical tell-tale signs. They just thought I was a shy FOB and American girls were too scary for me.

Eventually my sisters asked and I just shrugged and said “..Yeah.. I like guys.” I guess I’m lucky that my step-mom was as liberal as they come, and was cool about it. Maybe it was because I’m not her actual son. My dad, though..

He’s the kind of guy who likes to pretend to be a good guy, and wants everyone else to believe it too. He acts like he’s accepting of it, and me. But he makes a lot of gay jokes in this really nasty way. He’s half attacking but half trying to make you think he isn’t, to cover his ass. What I hate most is the way he looks at me. As if saying “You should be glad your Mother isn’t alive to see this.”

I remember my Mother. As I remember her.. she was a rebel. I don’t think she would have cared. She’d still have been my Mother.

I get different reactions in America, it’s so controversial sometimes.. sometimes I get praised, but other times people look at me like I am the devil. When I’m home in Japan.. when people found out they were like, “Ohhhh, SUGOI!” (Trans: cool.) They ask a lot of questions and are very interested. I guess it’s cultural differences. Sometimes it makes me homesick.

I guess the American uncertainty made me shy on the dating scene. After graduation I started working in bars as a bouncer, but I never dated much.. just one night stands and random hookups. They were easy, and I didn’t want any boyfriends, really. I guess I thought I was a wild boy.. people tried to hook me up, there were crushes.. but until I figured out my needs and curiosities, I wasn’t ready for that.

Now I guess I’ve matured. I’m in school, studying for an engineering degree, and I’m just.. content with my life, and my sexuality. I’m not involved right now and don’t plan to be.. I have other things I need to take care of. But I’m out and I’m okay with who I am and how I feel about it, and that’s part of being content with my life.

Tune in every Friday for the Come Out & Play series, featuring coming out stories of celebrities, every day people, personal reflections, advice, tid bits and everything else concerning the complicated world of coming out!

Got an interesting coming out story to tell? Contact me and I will feature it in an upcoming post of Come Out & Play.